I'll have the bedroom, you get the toilet

Firstly, let me start by saying there was no Saturday update mostly because my Saturday's are always too busy too watch TV and with a netball semi final on my mind, feng shui was the last thing I wanted to worry about, though I did use the opportunity to de-clutter the desk drawers (and we won our semi - woohoo!)

Sunday, however is a different story. After spending Friday night measuring up the unit to give me an accurate bagua, hubby wasn't quite as patient when I explained there were a few things we needed to discover before simply moving the furniture around. Still, he paced up and down as I sought answers to some of the more puzzling questions I was to face today.

My feng shui birth element is Water. Turns out this is based on the year you were born in the Chinese calendar, year of the dog, rat, etc. Easy done, know that one, this doesn't sound too difficult.

A water person embraces the flexibility of water but like water, can also wear down the hardest rock given enough time - which means nagging is an inherent part of me that simply has to be embraced!


Good Feng Shui for water people includes decorating in white, grey (metal), blue and black, but avoiding all 'sandy' or earthly colours. Water fountains, mirrors and art or photos depicting water are strongly advised, but earthenware, crystals or rocks are to be avoided.

Ok so now I have some boundaries - but then I looked around my bedroom..

EVERYTHING IS TIMBER! My bed, the bedside tables, bookshelf and tall boy - all of it! I started thinking "shit, the feng shui gods must be laughing at me" before I realised that wood is also a  feng shui element so it wouldn't be classed as 'earthly.' 

Still, I put blue sheets and a shades-of-blue doona cover on my bed just in case.

But then I read "feng shui tips for your bedroom" courtesy of About.com.

Best colours for a bedroom are "skin colours" and it's a good idea to avoid blue (unless sky blue) and be careful with mirrors it tells me. Well how can I do that if that's what my element tells me I need to have???

I've decided that feng shui is a bit like religion: you just pick the bits that work for you.

Then of course came the matter of where to place the bed. Originally, it was placed so that our heads were under the window and hubby closest to the door so that if we are ever robbed / attacked the robbers/attackers will get him first. I thought this was a sensible approach, but feng shui says no.

Apparently your 'chi' escapes out the window while you're sleeping if you have your head under it.

Right so now which way do we go? Our room only measures about 3.5m square so the options are limited. Never fear, this is what your 'Kua number' is for.

Your Kua Number if essentially your lucky number is worked out differently depending if your male or femals: just another way the universe puts the sexes on polar opposites. And yep, what do you know it my lucky number is 6 and his is 9. 

69

While hubby cracks himself up about some crass image he has forming in his head, I read further to discover my ideal direction is west and his is east. Single beds are banned so how the hell is this going to work??

We try for some non-feng shui discussion and arguments fly back and forth using logic that doesn't extend further than " I don't want to be the first person the robbers get" and "I pee more during the night than you do."

Sadly, this gets us nowhere and further research reveals a solution. If it isn't possible to satisfy the feng shui gods of both people in the bedroom, then one gets the bedroom and the other gets the other room they spend most of their time in.

I win the bedroom, Matt gets the living room - which, if anyone who's been to our place essentially means he gets the rest of the unit. I wanted to give him the toilet since he does spend a lot of time on there, but that got shot down.

I should point out that I won the bedroom mostly because apparently the top of the bed can't back on to a wall with electrical appliances on the other side.

The final result:

Space to move, clutter gone and enough space for me to store a cricket bat next to me for when the robbers come to visit....

Next stop, the living room

I didn't wear the Mentos so that totally counts

So apparently the first and most important step in introducing feng shui to your life is de-cluttering. Not just stuffing things into a cupboard so that the visible space looks clean, but completely getting rid of everything "you do not love" in your house.

But I love everything.

I need the year's supply of wipes from KFC & Red Rooster that I found among my 15 handbags, I need the thousands of bobby bins scattered in random locations throughout my bedroom, and most importantly I need the 10 different toiletry bags that I own.

I've been taking my feng shui advice from About.com and it recommends that you set yourself timed targets for the first stages of de-cluttering. I decided 20 mins should be enough to quickly go through my drawers and wardrobe and throw out the stuff I haven't worn this winter, or sadly, no longer fits.

I'm typing this 90 minutes after I started. And in that 90 minutes I've thrown out one pair of jeans (with holes), an airline ticket I found from 5 August 2010, 3 three t-shirts and a handful of squished Mentos....

Not bad for a first attempt :-)

Invasion of the body snatchers...

My husband had just started drawing up a floor plan for my feng shui bagua without me even MENTIONING it.

I think he has been taken over by an alien life form: does anyone have the Men in Black on speed dial??

Dropping cars from a crane is a suitable alternative to Kochie...

When it comes to the battle of the TV breakfast shows I'm a Sunrise girl. I know Mel can be a little flippant and cheery at the most inappropriate of times and Kochie can come across as a bit of a wanker, but there's something about the show that compels me to tune in every morning.

Until today.

Today, the radio show I listen to on my way to work dropped two cars from 43 meters in the air to see which could make the biggest "whump."

It was like TopGear had come to Canberra.

Of course had my allergic-to-the-morning husband gotten out of bed when the alarm went off (why even se the alarm if you're not gong to get up when it goes off???) we could have watched it in person but there was something endearing about listening to two grown men giggle like school girls as they watched 2 tonnes of machinery crash to earth.

I don't think I've evry truly appreciated the power of listening as opposed to watching until you listen in on someone having the time of their life, and seeing the reactions of people around you. Matt drove to work with the BIGGEST smile on his face.

I guess the same can be said when you listen in on someones pain or anguish, so I was a little disappointed that I had gotten to work and out of the car before Scotty & Nige announced which of the owners of now pancake-like cars won a brand new Suszuki swift and which one a pushie....

I'm Inspiring!

Loving that onve of my faves "Emunchkin" is taking up the challenge with me :-)

I wonder how she'll go for the month we give up alcohol.... Luv ya Em xx

Anyone got a compass?

I'm so glad September 1 fell on a Thursday - it was always a poor TV viewing night in my book. Except when Grey's Anatomy was on (and only before Meredith irked me to the point where I stopped watching completely).

Day 1 went well, although I have had to make a few concessions to appease my surprisingly tolerant (though, 24 hours hasn't passed yet) husband. When it's my turn to cook and do the dishes, the TV can stay on but I have to potter about doing things - I can't stop and watch.

When it's his turn to cook and do the dishes I get banished to a non-TV room.

We had to come up with boundaries because anyone who has been to my place knows the main part of the unit is only about 10 meters long, which means there's only about 6 meters between the kitchen and the TV. Additionally, we generally cook whilst the news is on and my husband "feels it's important for you to at least hear what's going on in the world, just in case something relevant to your work arises."

This is man-speak for "don't involve me in your crazy-ass plan."

Feng Shui wise I gave myself a crash course in the basics, ready to start putting some bits of it into practice tomorrow. I've got to make my 'bagua,' find a compass and embrace essential oils.

Did you know that there is specific Feng Shui for your home, your office space, small kitchens, losing weight and increasing wealth? 

I didn't.

The things you learn when you're not lazing around watching TV :-)

Challenge 1

So in addition to giving up tv for a month, I now have to tell my husband we need to remove the tv from our bedroom because it's bad feng shui.....

Anyone know a good divorce lawyer?